(peak into my WAR ROOM}
Forgive me for the delay in posting this blog. I have been wrestling back and forth in my mind as to what God really wanted me to post. Well, actually wrestling with what I wanted to post and knowing what God wanted me to post. I wanted to talk about various things. So I procrastinated thinking that God would give me the okay to post one of those topics. Nope. He made it very clear that I needed to write about what He wanted.
As a child, my parents taught me and my brother how to say grace and say our prayers. I'm sure your parents or grandparents or someone you grew up around probably taught you the same thing. I remember memorizing those prayers and rushing through them as I sat down to eat or as I was getting in the bed. Since it became such a routine to say them at certain times of the day it was only natural that as I got older I would remember those prayers and continue to recite them at those specific times of the day. I would add a little extra flavor to them but not really anything drastic. I never saw a problem with that for a long time. It wasn't until recently that I realized my prayers need to GROW UP.
Now don't get me wrong and don't think I am judging anyone who says "God is great, God is good..." because I am not. Any prayer, to God, in reverence, is better than no prayer.
A few months ago I was listening to a sermon fromPastor Tony Evans. He was talking about prayer. In the sermon he said something that has weighed heavy on me ever since that day. He said "when you really want something from God... like when you really want him to show up and move big in your life you can't just say "grace" and think that that's enough for God to come through... you have to REALLY pray".
I sat in awe thinking about what he said for a few hours... Really pray....
It was so powerful to me. In my opinion when he said "grace" I don't think he meant the actual grace that you might say before you eat a meal. I think he was speaking of a little quick prayer that you might mumble before you go into work. Or the prayer you say when you run that stop light and hope that no police saw you and that no one was coming. Or those prayers that you pray everyday and you don't even realize you are repeating the same exact things over and over.
I am extremely guilty of these prayers. My "go-to" prayers.
I never really saw that I was doing anything "wrong" until he made that statement. But it hit hard. How could I really be expecting God to work out something that was so big in my life or come through for me when I can't go talk to him for longer than thirty seconds?
After hearing Pastor Evans say that it gave me two emotions instantly. Excitement and Discouragement.
Excitement, because I was ready to go and pray so hard and intensely that God would hear me loud and clear. Discouragement, because I quickly realized that I didn't know how to pray like that... How to Pray Intensely. But I did not let my discouragement hold me back. I prayed to the best of my ability. I prayed when I had quiet time with Jesus. I prayed through journaling. I prayed in the shower. I prayed whenever I thought about praying. But even though I was praying a lot more I found myself repeating things... being very redundant. After that realization discouragement set in. I kind of gave up. I felt silly. I felt like God was looking at me like "Brittany, you prayed about that this morning". I mean I know that God is not like man so that wasn't the case BUT I couldn't help how I felt.
Well just like God always seems to do... He worked it out. Did I doubt that he would? Slightly. Only because I felt like I needed to handle it... I mean... I just didn't feel right asking God to teach me how to pray... to Him. ( I know it sounds silly, but that's how my mind works) But I didn't even have to ask Him about it. He knew the desires of my heart. He knew I wanted to learn how to truly pray. He allowed the movie, War Room to come out right on time. He knew what I needed. He did that for me. :)
War Room was what I needed to get my jump start on exactly how to approach God about what's going on with me. I already had the logistics of prayer down... I just needed help approaching God. I needed help not feeling like I was silly or my prayers were not "passionate" enough. The movie allowed me to see that I was complicating it. I was making it so much more than it really was. I learned to just come to God as I am. Reverencing Him.... but just as I am. I saw that the only thing I needed to do was do it... I just needed to pray. The only way I would get better at coming to him was by coming to him. ALL the time. Everyday. NO exceptions. Invite him to spend the say with me. Never leave him out of anything.
I realized that the more I did it the easier it got to sit before His feet and acknowledge him and talk to him like I am speaking to you all. I can go to my " war room" ( a corner lol) and dwell in his presence with no hesitation.
I encourage you to find time to sit before His feet and talk to him. When you are on social media for fifteen minutes... put the phone down and talk to Him. I promise the more you do it, the more comfortable you feel doing it. Just like sitting down at a piano for the first time and having no clue how to play "Chop Sticks" but as you practice everyday you get more and more comfortable with it. Take up that habit with communicating with our God. The more you do it the more your heart will yearn to do it. Try it! You'll like it!
Write something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview.