We all fall into the trap of expectations. Whether big or small. For birthdays, holidays or random days. We all expect certain things to happen. If you are a mother you expect somebody to go all out for you on Mother’s Day. As a child we might have all expected to get the biggest gift on our Christmas list. As an employee we all expect a pat on the back or a hand clap from management. But there are times these things don’t happen and our expectations leave us upset or forgotten or just down right mad.
Sooooo... I’m going to let you get a peek at my life and how expectations got the best of me.
My husband, George, is an AMAZING guy. He is friendly, loving, great provider and an AMAZING father. Just an all around great person. BUT he is not a mind reader... i know you are saying “well duh Brittany”... well i thought he was. Lol! On my first Mother’s Day i expected George to lay out a spread of gifts and take me to dinner and just blow my mind. Now i should have known from jump that this is something that i shouldn’t expect because George is VERY simple! I mean the smallest things make him so happy. So let’s just say for my first Mother’s Day he went rather simple. And let’s just say i expressed my anger in a not so sweet and gentle way. I thought he didn’t think i was a good mother and that i wasn’t worthy of getting everything i EXPECTED to get. In all actuality George didn’t know. He didn’t know what to do. He didn’t know what i expected. He has never been a husband to a mother before so he didn’t think about it. He expressed all these things to me and I WAS STILL MAD!
I was wrong ya’ll. He did something from his heart and i completely rejected it. (Don’t judge me too hard).
So as this Mother’s Day rolled around i legit got anxiety. I expressed my anxiety to my mother because i needed her to calm me down because i didn’t not want a repeat of last year... NOT the getting a small gift part but my jacked up attitude part. As i expressed my feelings to my mama who is a George advocate, might i add. She says to me “maybe you expect too much”.
“Excuse me ma’am... how dare you?!” I thought. I was appalled.
I couldn’t handle that response so i went to another one of my older friends who has been married for 25 years and her husband’s personality is similar to George’s. She told me the same thing. (Boooo) and she told me to stop looking at what i think other people are getting. You don’t know the reasons behind their gifts and their circumstances. She explained things to me about George that i already knew. How he is a good man and how he makes an effort to make me happy everyday not just Mother’s Day. How he is faithful and loving and caring.
As i left from talking to her I didn’t feel any better. Not because of a gift but because i realized that i am selfish and ridiculous. Immediately God told me to write about expectations. But i was so shame i said “Ooo noooo! I couldn’t show people how much of a brat i am.” He quickly said Brittany you are human. Everyone struggles. Let someone know they aren’t alone. Give them a sense of relief. He said you were so upset with George because you expected so many tangible things. Things that fade and can easily be taken away... you didn’t except what he gave which was his heart.
God also reminded we that we treat him the same way.
We need a new car and we have our eyes on a certain car but when we get to the dealership our budget doesn’t fit what we thought we should get and now our expectations are crushed. BUT God still gets us a car. But now we are mad and fussing... talking about “but God said he would give me my hearts desires...”
Well he did. A car is your hearts desire. He blessed you with what you needed. A car! A car you can drive. And afford to pay for. And go to work in. And put groceries in. BUT because it isn’t THE car you expected it’s no good.
We got to do better!
What are you expecting?
Don’t get me wrong. There have been many times in my life where God was spot on with meeting my expectations and my wants. And I ended up happy for a few months or so and then sooner rather than later my conversation sounding like “this is what I’m going to do next and how things will happen next time.” NEVER SATISFIED!
Expectations can have us mad at people and God but have you ever thought how they can have people and God mad at you. Shaking their heads like “you ain’t never gone be happy”
Take a step back. Look at what you have. Look at what you want? You expecting too much?
I’m not going to be unrealistic and say to stop expecting, that’s human nature. But i promise when you let go of some of what you THINK you should have God will blow your mind and sometimes people will too.
Once I asked God to remove the anxiety from my heart about Mother’s Day and i really prayed for me to receive George’s sincerity i ended up having the best day and George didn’t do too bad either!
Until Next My next Post,
A few scriptures to ponder on...
“The hopes of the godly result in happiness, but the expectations of the wicked come to nothing.”
“Let all that I am wait quietly before God, for my hope is in him.”
Psalms 62:5 NLT
“This is the LORD’s doing, and it is wonderful to see.’ ””
Mark 12:11 NLT
Write something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview.